I make a habit of keeping informed on current technology trends, marketing and reading between the lines with news releases.
Well, sure of course I love annoying humans... pushing them to see how far they will go, before they SNAP!... hey, I'm a cat! But, I occasionally let my eyes stray across certain articles (Well this is what... 2013 - or whatever you humans have called it - and I am certainly an emancipated cat), in fact I am an avid reader, have views on just about everything, and well - if I say it myself - am extremely well informed.
Now, I know most humans can be a little dumb (Ahem … understatement, please see some of my previous posts), but you'd think the mighty likes of Intel and Microsoft who have huge resources and even larger budgets could employ some half decent marketing?? Or am I just being sensible?
Firstly, let's examine Microsoft and MS Windows, for example… hugely successful… eventually. But, let's see…
…we've had:
Windows 1 to 3 (Have you seen Steve Ballmer's ads from the time!)
Windows 3.1 (the first decent and really usable Windows)
Then...
- Windows 95
- Windows NTx
- Windows 98
- Windows 2000
- Windows ME
- Windows XP
- Windows Vista
- Windows 7
- ...and Windows 8
Spot the problem? Mmm… now let me see, if Bill Gates was as smart as me (yeah, right) and already used to a succession of iterated and increasingly successful software, you would have thought he and some of his highly paid marketing people would have come up with a half-way decent naming strategy for their most lucrative product… yeah, no… der!!
But, no. That naming strategy isn't a strategy at all. It's a seemingly random sequence of names, and the only consistent part of the title is "Windows" … brilliant! Now, is it possible this have happened on purpose? No, not in a company like Microsoft. Were the people behind the new products so ashamed of the previous incarnation that they wanted a name not even close to the predecessor? Maybe. Or, was it a case of "new people, new team, new strategy on each release… " ...more than likely.
Just 'Google' or 'Bing!' (now there's a name... could be straight our of Friends!) for Microsoft naming strategies, and you'll get as many theories as there are Windows updates…
Meow! This cat's got claws!!
But, no. That naming strategy isn't a strategy at all. It's a seemingly random sequence of names, and the only consistent part of the title is "Windows" … brilliant! Now, is it possible this have happened on purpose? No, not in a company like Microsoft. Were the people behind the new products so ashamed of the previous incarnation that they wanted a name not even close to the predecessor? Maybe. Or, was it a case of "new people, new team, new strategy on each release… " ...more than likely.
Just 'Google' or 'Bing!' (now there's a name... could be straight our of Friends!) for Microsoft naming strategies, and you'll get as many theories as there are Windows updates…
Meow! This cat's got claws!!
Then, there's Intel… they are not much better. Actually a great deal worse in many ways.
First (and don't nitpick this list or else… I know I'm précising… ) there was the Intel 8086 in 1978 (x86) … nice, we all know where we are.
Followed by the Intel 8088
Then…
Atom, Celeron, Pentium Dual-Core, Core 2, Core i3, Core i5 and Core i7 ...
Okay, I give up!
Now, even Intel have begun to notice the problem, and in future the company is ditching its array of confusing names such as Core 2 Duo and Core 2 Quad - and at last introducing a simplified family of Core processors.
There are doubtless thousands of other examples from as many companies, but if you're going to make a point, make a BIG one! Okay, I've been a little hard on Intel - they have had and do have a multitude of processor versions and variants. But, according to my boss (Griff), he had a long discussion with a high-ranking Intel exec who didn't understand his own product range naming convention, so Griff explained it to him!
If some of the folks at Intel don't understand their own naming conventions, how the hell, is the public supposed to know!
In these times of economic problems (I will NOT used the "r" word), and with computer manufacturers margins being cut to single figures percentages, AND Netbooks confusing the market with practically no margin at all… you'd think the manufacturers would be busting Intel's door down insisting that they clarify so the public and business sectors know what they're actually buying…
But, maybe that's tooooo simple. But then, what do I know? I'm just your not so average cat.
First (and don't nitpick this list or else… I know I'm précising… ) there was the Intel 8086 in 1978 (x86) … nice, we all know where we are.
Followed by the Intel 8088
Then…
- Intel 186/188 … again nice, we all know where we are.
- Intel 286 …okay.
- Intel 386 …okay.
- Intel 486 …okay.
- Intel 486SX …I'm getting worried again!
- Intel 486DX2 ..not again.
- Intel 486SL …slim line anyone?
- Intel 486DX4 …and again!
- Intel Pentium (Classic) … uh oh… beginning to go off track here…
- Intel Pentium Pro… Oh, this is where it all started to go wrong!
- Intel Pentium Pro with MMX Technology … Oh, hooray for MMX! What a name… NOT!
- Pentium II …Okay, classic mistake. Going II can only get worse, especially in Roman numerals
- Celeron … Is that another word for cut-down Pentium II?
- Pentium III …Okay, possibly back on track again.
- Pentium 4 …NO! They lost their nerve and dumped the Roman numerals.
- Pentium M …What!
- Intel Core …? What the ...
- Celeron M …a tentative maybe, if you like that kind of thing!
- Celeron D …okay'ish
- Mobile Pentium 4-M … O-kay…
- Pentium 4EE …NO!
- Pentium 4E …Makes NO sense at all!
- Pentium 4F …Meanwhile
- Pentium D … Eyebrows simply raised at this point!
- Pentium Extreme Edition … Oh, this is just stupid! Perhaps it was named by a games playing first day intern!
- Intel Core 2 …Okay. Fresh start!
- Core 2 Duo …What the ...
- Core 2 Extreme …What!
- Core 2 Duo E4600
- Core 2 Duo T7800
- Core 2 Extreme QX6850
- Core 2 Quad Q6700
- Core 2 Extreme QX9770
- Core 2 Quad Q9650
- Pentium Dual Core
- Intel Pentium E2220
- Intel Pentium E5400
- Celeron M
- Core i7
Atom, Celeron, Pentium Dual-Core, Core 2, Core i3, Core i5 and Core i7 ...
Okay, I give up!
Now, even Intel have begun to notice the problem, and in future the company is ditching its array of confusing names such as Core 2 Duo and Core 2 Quad - and at last introducing a simplified family of Core processors.
- Entry level = i3
- Mid level = i5
- High-end = i7
There are doubtless thousands of other examples from as many companies, but if you're going to make a point, make a BIG one! Okay, I've been a little hard on Intel - they have had and do have a multitude of processor versions and variants. But, according to my boss (Griff), he had a long discussion with a high-ranking Intel exec who didn't understand his own product range naming convention, so Griff explained it to him!
If some of the folks at Intel don't understand their own naming conventions, how the hell, is the public supposed to know!
In these times of economic problems (I will NOT used the "r" word), and with computer manufacturers margins being cut to single figures percentages, AND Netbooks confusing the market with practically no margin at all… you'd think the manufacturers would be busting Intel's door down insisting that they clarify so the public and business sectors know what they're actually buying…
But, maybe that's tooooo simple. But then, what do I know? I'm just your not so average cat.
For good product naming, look at aircraft as an example...
Boeing
The USAF use consistent numbering: F for fighter (F117), B for Bomber (B2)
Or even airplanes with exciting names: Spitfire MK1 thru to MKXVI
See, it can be done! Just needs a little logic and forward thinking...
BTW! Who the hell named me Tin-Tin!!! MEOW!
Boeing
- Boeing 707
- Boeing 727
- Boeing 737-x00
- Boeing 747-x00
- Boeing 757-x00
- Boeing 767-x00
- Boeing 777-x00
- Boeing 787-x00
The USAF use consistent numbering: F for fighter (F117), B for Bomber (B2)
Or even airplanes with exciting names: Spitfire MK1 thru to MKXVI
See, it can be done! Just needs a little logic and forward thinking...
BTW! Who the hell named me Tin-Tin!!! MEOW!
Night, suckers...
